Blackotter :: Journal

2005-10-03 09:40:00
AIDSWalk

So the weekend is over and I want to thank evreyone again for all their donations to my AIDSWalk. It was a beautiful day and there were tons of walkers there. There was a marching band from a local high school that played and marched and danced the enitre walk. Tons of dogs. It was a moving days. There were folks with pictures of their lost loved ones and people shedding silent tears. A very moving day all around.

2005-10-03 15:04:00
oh my god being a contractor working without a contract of the first day of the fiscal year can be SOOOO much fucking fun.

2005-10-04 14:10:00
muse
where the hell is my muse? what have i done to make this fickle bitch leave me. for years I would get such incredible joy spending hours at the coffee shop and writing. now I sit at Common Grounds in arlington and I have this killer fucking scene in my head and I can't put the fucking thing on "paper". I can see every detail, every color, and it's just sitting there in my head. ARG FUCKING ARG.

2005-10-06 09:39:00
I'm over this day. My allergies are killing me. I just had a friend throw the fact that I am all talk and no action in my face and that really hurt for some reason. I have been bitching about my job in one way or another for years and how i would love to get out and try new stuff but I have my perky ass placed so delicately on this stack of bills that anything less that what I am making now will finish me. I feel like I am at the that part out west where the four states touch and I dont want to choose one, i want them all.

I hate today

2005-10-06 11:04:00
So yesterday was day in limbo part two on the contract crap and I sat in out Chantilly office playing games on my ibook and writing. Now I want to play that damn marble game that comes with the computer. I want to play that now.

I'm horny but too tired to imagine actually having sex much less masturbating. Damn.

They are also replacing all the dim dingy light in the hallways with this evil superbright floueseant crap. It actually hurts my eyes.

I'm boring today.

I don't even have to fart.

2005-10-06 11:19:00
i just had the most amazing conversation that literally have maybe 4 vowels in the whole thing. It was server names and tons of fucking acronyms. I was almost laughing.

2005-10-06 13:52:00

I would look so cute in this. DAMN YOU EBAY!

2005-10-06 17:02:00

2005-10-09 08:21:00
morning,why an i awake so damn early. wah.

2005-10-09 12:10:00
Hey all,

We have an artist dong a pic of us, its Andy Runton the ceator or Owly and he wants to know what animals Ky and I should be. Looking at us and knowing me what animals do you think represent us.

Thanks

2005-10-11 12:07:00
i was woken this morning not by the sound of the alarm but the sound of silence. All the computer fans and tivo noice and general hum went away and that instantly woke me up. I hate no power. So i showered but couldn't wash my hair, no power for the hairdryer and since my hair is so long i need a dryer, and now i feel all greasy. Work is a hectic busy nightmare. I feel like a lard ass. I'm tired.

But it's gloomy outside and grey and that's nice. I like fall.

2005-10-12 09:12:00
There is no sound in the world like a military formation running past you while they sing cadence. I mean really. It's like an instawoodie. I've been getting that since my father used to take me to Miramar in san diego. uniforms...drool....

2005-10-12 09:24:00
FRANKENBERRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so i have to apologize now for all the InSaNe ramblin's that will come through out the day. I am totally wired right now and I have no idea why. It's crazy. And i have hardly touched my coffee.

And so i was walking through the safeway to get my starbucks (because you buy seven and your eighth is free!) and i realized that i needed a salad and i got that and i was passed the HaLlOwEeN section and there was Frankenberry cereal. Dude I so had to get that! And it's so bad it's good. I just need some soy milk so I can watch it turn pink. And then the checkout girl was all smiley like and cute and the usually snarly dude was a bit more chipper as he got my coffee and now i can't seem to blink and it's odd. Yeah.

I think it the last sign of the apocalypse.

2005-10-12 14:48:00
damn you apple. why do i love you so? you keep tossing these wonderful toys in my face and I want them all! i want a imac, i want the new video ipod... i want to make my house all white...

and funny they are painting all the walls bright white in my office. i dont know why.

I WANT TOYS

2005-10-14 00:19:00
wow.

everyone is freaking tense here at work because we have to do a lot of stuff between now and tomorrow. like tons of stuff to get the new software out to, um well, the world. And we can't get a new version of this thing we need up and someone just deleted some back ups that someone else needed. It's insane.

i want to be back in bed.

2005-10-14 22:40:00
i know i'm just angry at the damn machines but i hate sun, i hate java and i need to fart REALLY bad and i know it's going to be an office clearer and I'm in the middle of something. And some of these people are really getting on my nervers.

i need a drink

2005-10-15 00:46:00
everyone gets so cranky when there is this incredible rush to get everything done.

go fig

2005-10-15 03:50:00
Sunday.

Vienna.

Big Planet Comics.

Working 12-5.

Visit me. Laugh while i try to work the register.

Bring me Starbucks (either a red eye or SOY pumpkin spice latte)

2005-10-15 23:23:00
what a beautiful day ... to be inside. At least it's only once in a while that I have to work on weekends at my full time job but does it have to be such a beautiful day? sigh

2005-10-16 06:39:00
till at work. it's now been a full 8 hour day and its getting longer.

i want to hit people with bats. large bats with spikes. with large spikes.

fuck the world, i wanna get off.

2005-10-16 12:25:00
igh

25 minutes in

4 hours and 35 to go

thank god for simpsons on my ibook

2005-10-17 09:07:00
ug.

Ya know i really love morning in the fall where it's still dark when I get out and get on the road. I used to try and get to the office before the sun rose. I don't know if this was some sick way to get in the windowless office I live in before the sun rises but it's actuallykinda nice to get out and have so much less traffic.

And now everything looks to be going worse than it was on saturday because we now have an office full of people to tell us all the other parts of the system that arebreaking. Sigh.

2005-10-17 17:11:00
head meet gun

gun meet head

2005-10-17 19:16:00
i have now been at work for 12 hours and counting. It wouldn't be so bad if there had been any down time but it's been constant all day and dealing the a way overly complicated system, no back up, and having to learn a lot of sysadmin and replication admin stuff just to make the whole fucking thing work. We told them it was going to be rough going but they said it would all be fine. I wanna drink.

Drink

Drank

Drunk

And I know she has nothing to do till we get this piece of shit up, but does my boss HAVE to play Soliare right next to me? I know she has no techincal knowledge what-so-ever but then she pipes up and takes charge and man the whole thing gets my goat.

I want my goat back! arg

2005-10-17 22:30:00
madonna sampling ABBA. intriguing. i am with the liking of the single. Excited am i for the record.

(record?)

2005-10-18 13:31:00
Lots of useless knowledge about me.

Name:	Brett
Birthdate:	March 21, 1971
Birthplace:	San Diego
Current Location:	Washington, DC
Eye Color:	Blue
Hair Color:	Red
Height:	6'1
Weight:	175
Piercings:	Nope
Tatoos:	Nope
Boyfriend/Girlfriend:	Boyfriend
Overused Phraze:
FAVORITES
Food:	Flank stake wrapped in bacon
Candy:	Abba Zabba
Number:	14
Color:	Green
Animal:	Tiger family/Monkeys
Drink:	Coke Zero
Alcohol Drink:	Gin and Tonic
Bagel:	Everything
Letter:	A
Body Part on Opposite sex:	Tits
This or That
Pepsi or Coke:	Coke
McDonalds or BurgerKing:	McDonalds
Strawberry or Watermelon:	Strawberry
Hot tea or Ice tea:	Hot tea
Chocolate or Vanilla	Vanilla
Hot Chocolate or Coffee:	Coffee
Kiss or Hug:	Kiss
Dog or Cat:	Dog
Rap or Punk:	Punk!
Summer or Winter:	Winter
Scary Movies or Funny Movies:	Funny Movies
Love or Money:	Love (with someone rich LOL)
YOUR...
Bedtime:	Midnight ish
Most Missed Memory:	I dont remember
Best phyiscal feature:	My ass as I walk away
First Thought Waking Up:	Fuck
Goal for this year:	lose 10 pounds
Best Friends:
Weakness:
Fears:	Clowns
Heritage:
Longest relationship:
HAVE YOU...
Ever Drank:	Yes
Ever Smoked:	yes
Pot:	yes
Ever been Drunk:	yes
Ever been beaten up:	no
Ever beaten someone up:	yes
Ever Shoplifted:	yes
Ever Skinny Dipped:	yes
Ever Kissed Opposite sex:	yes
Been Dumped Lately:	no
IN A GUY/GIRL
Favorite Eye Color:	any
Favorite Hair Color:	dark
Short or Long:	either
Height:	around me
Style:
Looks or Personality:	stylish but individual
Hot or Cute	both
Drugs and Alcohol:	no drugs, lots of alcohol
Muscular or Really Skinny:	not too big, not too small
RANDOMS
Number of Regrets in the Past:	more than I want
What country do you want to Visit:	Russia
How do you want to Die:	In my sleep with friends knowing that I'm ok
Been to the Mall Lately:	hell yeah
Do you like Thunderstorms:	yuppers
Get along with your Parents:	yuppers
Health Freak:	no
Do you think your Attractive:	no
Believe in Yourself:	i believe i am here
Want to go to College:	did
Do you Smoke:	sorta....
Do you Drink:	hell yeah
Shower Daily:	HELL YEAH
Been in Love:	yuppers
Do you Sing:	noppers
Want to get Married:	sure
Do you want Children:	if i do cool, if i don't cool
Have your future kids names planned out:	no
Age you wanna lose your Virginity:	did
Hate anyone:	how many spaces do i have?
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

2005-10-18 15:51:00
Well this is another day where things just seem to go wrong. It was a day I hoped to get out early, but that's not happening again. But now the woman I was working with isn't here and i'm trying to out all this shit alone. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I was proud of myself for what I did on saturday and monday, today will be a challenege.

I have your check TY. I will main it tomorrow. PROMISE. I love my new bed.

I wish i were in it

2005-10-18 19:22:00
7:30

still at work

actually getting a lot done

why is this kinda fun

i need help

2005-10-19 09:10:00
Not shocked.

You fit in with: Spiritualism Your ideals are mostly spiritual, but in an individualistic way. While spirituality is very important in your life, organized religion itself may not be for you. It is best for you to seek these things on your own terms. 60% spiritual. 40% reason-oriented.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

2005-10-19 14:31:00
Truest whoroscope ever. :)

This could turn into quite the enjoyable day -- if you don't

mind stress, that is. And while you'd probably never admit to it (at

least, not unless you're under duress), you find stress motivational.

Oh, and look -- here comes some now.

2005-10-20 09:23:00
one day i will realize that it's never a good thing to lay in bed when i am exhausted and try and relax with a little tv. i was cleaning out tivo, saw that I had some Fosters on there and was missing ky and so put one on. Fell alseep in about 15 seconds and woke up two hours later with my glasses poking me in the face and the tv on. I was annoyed. I do this a lot.

2005-10-21 09:00:00
starting day 12 in a row with work.

looking older each day.

may have to work this weekend as well.

not too stressed because it has to be done.

sucks that i dont get overtime.

sucks that most of my coworkers at TOOLS!

want to be snuggled up with ky asleep.

or riding coasters. i could go for a nice hard ride right now.

hehehehe

2005-10-21 14:56:00
oh my god i have to work again over the weekend. arg.

i hate iplanet 5.1.

i hate having to test the patches on the operational system

i hate that I am out of coffee.

i feel like e.e.cummings

mmm i said e.e.

2005-10-22 23:15:00
Julie Christie rocks

I dont know what it is about Julie Christie that I adore but I think this is fascinating. I'm currently sitting at home watching Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Her scene is small but there is an energy the she brings to the scene. Maybe I'm just craxy for british ladies.

But the more I watch this movie, the more I love it. And now that I have the book out of my head, I can enjoy it without the endless comparisons.

Overall it's been a good and interesting day. I spent a lot of it in my head but not in a bad place most of the time. There is still that annoyance of being somewhere and having the feeling there everyone is looking at me. I hate that. I can't seem to walk anywhere with confidence. I think that people are always laughing, judging, mocking me all the time. Maybe I spend too much time alone and should get myself into things. There were a bunch of activities in the blade and MW that seem like fun.

Enough of that pity party crap. I also got a lot done on the outline of my story. i doubt anyone will want to read it but at least I will get it done. And I actually like what I have so far. So, at least i have the start and the conflict and the resolution and now just need to sit down and git her done.

Anyone love Abba Zaba? Anyone know what it is? I ordered some from Amazon and didn't realize I was getting 6 pounds of it. LOL Damn this is good candy.

I think I want to take a dance class.

2005-10-23 11:09:00
Nothing is going right at work. In fact, everything is going horribly wrong. And I mean besides the fact that it's sunday and I'm at the office. I could be at Renn Faire. ( I haven't been this year )

blarg.

2005-10-26 10:14:00
I think things are beginning to calm down. That or we have reached a new level WTF. I can't decide.

Spurily went to the High Heel Races last night with Leland and had a blast. I first stopped by Best Buy to get my Bewitched Season 2 and then headed over aroung 7.30 to his house. We walked over in the drizzle and caught up on things. Got to the race and actually got a good view. Leland has this fantastically huge umbrella and we covered this nice lesbian couple. They were awesome and we all wanted to deck this blond chicklette who was way too snarky for how ugly she was. Mix Lee Majors and Dee Snyder together and put a wig on it, and that was her. I wanted to smash her hace into the curb.

ANYWAY, there were tons of really good costumes and fun people. The Fants girls were there, at least to Princess Di's, Nuns (mmmm) and various other stuff. There is nothing like a hundred drag queens hauling ass down the street to win a $500 bar tab. It as hysterical.

Then came home, chatted, was on the phone and watched the first episode of Bewitched here while Ky watched it at his place (insert vomiting here) and then had a fanta-tastic sleep.

Good mood.

2005-10-26 15:21:00
burping up Wendy's chili is not a good thing.

ewwwwwwww

2005-10-26 21:17:00
the awkwardly feminine or possibly Canadian

Ok I love the movie dodgeball.

2005-10-27 13:53:00
Ever disliked someone so much that just the look sight of them makes you angry? We have a guy here at my office that is that man for me. He knows nothing about his job, web master, and doesn't seem all that keen on learning anything. He stupid and I mean by that that if tests were done on him, he would honestly be below standard intelligence. I don't know that I have seem him really do work. Sure I get on and fuck around but I have 102 hours so far this two week pay period and I am getting a lot of shit done. He lumbers around the office like a frickin idiot. He talks all the time. If you get him talking, he will talk for hours, i have seen him chat this guy up for over an hour. I hate this man. Everyone in the office hates this guy. He has be 'talked to' numerous time and yet he is still here. I think because the contract people at his company fucked up and can't fire him since they have no one else to fill the role. It bothers me everyday.

whew

2005-10-27 14:53:00
whip

For the love of fucking god, i f I am ordering a soy pumpkin spice latte, I do not want real whip cream!!

Tards

2005-10-31 11:16:00
Wonderful weekend. Friday went to Ky's and vegged around in the tub and ate pomegrantes and drank wine. We picked up on a whim a red wine called Vampire. It was awesome! So we drank all that and a Merlot called Werewolf. Not nearly as good as Vampire.

Saturday we froze out butts off at Busch Gardens. Had a freaking blast. There were some rather unpleasant images and memories like Pumpkin Jack nad his ghoolies singing Dancing Queen. Yes i know it's the middle of the day and the kids are easily scared but still. That was rather disturbing. But the park was well decorated and all the performers were nice and they all danced well. When night came things got fun. The park is amazing with the lights and the fog. The hauned house was scary, well mostly jumpy, but cool.

Yesterday we watched Drawn Together on DVD. I had seen a few of these shows on Comedy Central and remembered laughing my ass off. The DVD's are freaking hysterical. It' sjust funny to hear a cartoon curse. One of the songs on a show was called La La Labia...it's just unbelivable.

Click here to visit his page. lol I'm still laughing."